DAY #289: Ephesians 5:21-6:9

People often misunderstand the concept of submitting to another person. When we submit to God, we become more willing to obey his command to submit to others, that is, to subordinate our rights to theirs. In Paul’s day, women, children, and slaves were to submit to the head of the family—slaves would submit until they were freed, male children until they grew up, and women and girls their whole lives.

Submission provides evidence that we have Spirit-controlled relationships, and it requires the Holy Spirit’s guidance and restraint. In the church, the believers should be willing to learn from, serve, give to, or be corrected by others in the fellowship. Such submission can allow growth both individually and corporately as the believers seek to follow Christ.

Submission in the church should follow from submission in the home. The home, the foundation for relationships and personal growth, must be an example of peaceful submission. In a marriage relationship, both husband and wife are called to submit. The relationships between husbands and wives are a microcosm of the larger picture of church relationships.

Paul spoke first to the wives, explaining that they were to submit voluntarily to their husbands as they would to the Lord, meaning “as is fitting to the Lord.” This does not mean that the husband is “lord” over the wife. Our concept of submission must come from that which exists between Christ and the church: Christ loves the church, and the church submits to him.

Paul explained that a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of his body, the church. In other words, the husband is the spiritual head of the family, and his wife should acknowledge his leadership. Real spiritual leadership involves service and sacrifice. Christ as head of the church is also its Savior. Christ gave his life for the church. So, as the church submits to Christ, so the wives must submit to their husbands in everything.

A wise and Christ-honoring husband will not take advantage of his leadership role, and a wise and Christ-honoring wife will not try to undermine her husband’s leadership. Either approach causes disunity and friction in marriage. For the wife, submission means willingly following her husband’s leadership in Christ. For the husband, it means putting aside his own interests in order to care for his wife.

The husband loves his wife not as an extension of self-love but because it is advantageous both to her and to himself. The Greek word for “love” is agapa, referring to an unconditional love that seeks the highest good for the other. When a husband loves his wife with this kind of love, they both will benefit. A wife need not worry about submitting to a husband who treats her this way.

The union of husband and wife, although sometimes imperfect, provides the best picture to describe the union of Christ with his church. The picture we experience in marriage is an analogy of the relationship of Christ and believers.

Intimacy and oneness, and self-sacrifice is what should describe every marriage, it is a perfect picture of Christ and the church. These are the ingredients to a great marriage.

SO WHAT? (what will I do with what i have read today?)

Great marriages don't just happen. They take constant work. Have you noticed how the focus shifts after you get married? Before marriage the focus is "What can I do to please you?" That's called dating. After you get married it's "Get it yourself!" What happened? There was a shift in focus.

If you're going to build a great marriage, you need a power, beyond yourself. You need a power greater than yourself to serve and forgive and love. You need a power greater than yourself to work at putting your spouses needs ahead of your own.

You say, "Where am I supposed to find the energy and power to meet the needs of my mate when I'm worn out?" Philippians 2:13 says, "God, who is at work within you, will give you the will and the power to achieve his purpose."

Whatever God ask you to do (expects you to do) He always empowers you to do. If He says, meet the needs of your mate, He'll give you the power. That's why you need God. It take three to make a marriage work: a husband, a wife, and God. It's like a three-legged stool. If you take God out of the picture, you've got a two-legged stool. It's going to fall over. That's why the divorce rate is soaring in America. Marriage is God's idea. He says, I want to have the husband, wife and Me; I'll make the two, one. I don't know how people make it without the Lord in their lives and marriage. Many don't.

God says He wants to help you, empower you, to meet the needs of your mate. Because human love wears out. There are some times I run dry. There are some times I don't love my wife. There are some times when I'm fatigued I want to be alone, I don't want to be around anybody. I have nothing left to give. But it's at that point in my life I say, "God, Your power never runs dry. Your love never runs dry. Love Sharon through me." And He gives me the power to meet the needs of my wife when I don't have the energy to do it if I trust in Him.

Lord, help me today to love Sharon and serve Sharon and put her needs ahead of my own.